Social Vampires

I'll seem way less ranty if I put gifs and silly pictures in here. Maybe this blog post will make a couple young artists better at networking/self-promotion.

gif from American Psycho

There's a breed of artist/human that I keep coming across that is just sweeping across social media and real life events. They look just like us. They talk like us. Sometimes you'll feel a chill go up your spine and it may be because you're in the presence of a... SOCIAL VAMPIRE.  Here are signs that you or your friend may be a social vampire.

gif from 30 Rock

 1.They friend everyone on Facebook and then unfollow everyone on Facebook. Except maybe those who might hire them.

gif from The Green Hornet

2.Someone else has the connections they want on Facebook? They will post their art,writing,etc and tag people who have the audience they want.

gif from Black Books

3.They promote their work and projects but do not participate.

 "HELLO WORLD! I have a gift. ME." 

Reddit, Facebook Groups, LinkedIn, Twitter, and DeviantArt are their tools and community a foreign concept. It's good to spread your work around but try to participate in some of the communities and understand why nobody responds when you don't.

gif from I have no idea where 

(I really wanted a gif of Jar Jar saying "


should follow me now

, okeeday?" but no luck)

4. They love "who is following you back" sites for Twitter,FB,etc. "You don't follow me! BLASPHEMY! How could I possssssibly be interested in your content if you're not seeing mine?! I only followed you so that you would follow me back, I could ignore your stuff, and maybe you would be suckered into contributing to my thing. Here's a auto message through Twitter for following me so that you can be reminded that I primarily want your money."

gif from King of the Hill

 5. They have just added you on social media and message within 30 minutes asking you to create fan art for their IP, your client contact information or to pledge/promote their thing.

Screen from New Girl

5. Every sentence is an "I" sentence. Ever found yourself in a conversation that seems to die after two sentences? You may have stumbled into a social vampire enclave! Does every sentence begin with I? No questions have been asked of anyone besides what you have said? RUN!

gif from Supernatural

6. When a social vampire finds itself alone with what I assume appears to be husks to them, they will draw forth their phones and OH HOW the checking of the e-mails shall commence! Eye contact? Only if thou art their prey. RUN!

7. The most devious activity of the social vampire is the sabotage. On occasion the social vampire will actually denigrate the work of others or actively block others' access to what it deems their source of food. Everyone at an event passing their work around? Guess who is hoarding it all and then suddenly turning it all over when time is up? Meanwhile they bring plenty of work to share. They want into an art show or more wall space and it's, "so and so hasn't been doing this long enough/isn't good enough/doesn't sell anything/is selling under the table/isn't whatever enough".

gif from Supernatural

8.The social vampire is also known for their backlash at those in the industry who critique when asked to critique or simply do not acknowledge their greatness. Here's a

great example

from the writing world.

I blame Patreon, Kickstarter and Kindle Unlimited. Let's all go out and make friends. Find out what people like. What are they going through? What are they working on and why? What are their hobbies,favorite foods,shows,etc? How is their family? Take a genuine interest in their lives. Make connections with human beings because most human beings are interesting and it will make you a better person and smarter. Help others through your feedback and sharing. Eventually you won't even have to ask others for help.

This post was something I have been thinking about ever since hearing

Creative Pep Talk Podcast

a couple months ago and just a recent event made me want to finally put together a post.

Joe SlucherComment